Why Do Narcissists Hoover After Discard?
Narcissistic individuals often exhibit a complex and often destructive behavior pattern known as “hoovering” after they have discarded their partners. Hoovering refers to the behavior of a narcissist who attempts to rekindle a relationship with someone they have previously rejected or discarded. This article delves into the reasons behind this peculiar behavior and explores the psychological underpinnings of narcissistic hoovering.
Understanding Narcissism
Narcissism is a personality disorder characterized by an inflated sense of self-importance, a deep need for admiration, and a lack of empathy. Narcissists often have a distorted self-image and crave constant validation from others. This need for admiration can lead them to form and break relationships rapidly, as they seek to satisfy their own emotional needs rather than those of their partners.
Power and Control
One of the primary reasons why narcissists hoover after discard is the desire to maintain power and control over their former partners. By attempting to rekindle the relationship, the narcissist aims to regain the emotional leverage they once held. This power struggle is a manifestation of their need to feel superior and in control, even after the relationship has ended.
Validation and Esteem
Narcissists often suffer from low self-esteem and seek validation from others to compensate for their inner insecurities. After discarding a partner, the narcissist may feel a loss of validation and-esteem. Hoovering serves as a way to regain this validation by attempting to rekindle the relationship and once again become the center of attention.
Manipulation and Sadistic Gratification
Narcissists are master manipulators, and hoovering is a form of manipulation. By hoovering, they can evoke emotions of guilt, fear, and uncertainty in their former partners, making them feel responsible for the relationship’s failure. This manipulation can provide a sense of sadistic gratification for the narcissist, as they watch their former partners struggle with their feelings.
Emotional Dependency
Narcissists often struggle with emotional dependency, which can lead them to hoover after discard. They may feel a deep need for emotional closeness and connection, even if it means manipulating or coercing their former partners into rekindling the relationship. This emotional dependency can be difficult to break, as the narcissist may feel they cannot function without the constant validation and admiration they receive from others.
Recovery and Growth
Understanding the reasons behind narcissistic hoovering can be a crucial step in the recovery process for those who have been discarded. By recognizing the manipulative tactics and the underlying psychological issues, individuals can begin to heal and move on from the relationship. It is important to seek support from friends, family, or mental health professionals to navigate through the complexities of narcissistic hoovering.
In conclusion, narcissists hoover after discard due to a combination of power struggles, the need for validation, manipulation, and emotional dependency. Understanding these reasons can help individuals who have been discarded to heal and move forward, while also shedding light on the intricate nature of narcissistic relationships.
